Hatred is generally believed to be something that is ignited from external objects or beings. However, it must be understood and realised that we also play a part in causing a hateful situation. If we are in a position to internalise this fact then we won’t place all the blame on others and we can develop a forgiving attitude. This is a substantial step towards cutting through hatred. If you look in a mirror with a green face, for example, then you will see that same green face reflected back at you but if you have a pleasant face then there will be a similar pleasing reflection.
The point here is to realise your own fault and develop forgiveness for the faults of others. This will bring a positive attitude and emotions in your life and it will also have a positive impact on others, even if the other person is at fault. If you develop space to forgive then this quality will help you overcome suffering and develop a loving attitude to all.
— 17th Karmapa, Ogyen Trinley Dorje